Painful, Participating and Pragmatic
Ironically, this is take two. (Well, take three now, since I moved this blog from Blogger.) What I mean is this: I was so self-conscious about this page that I deleted it.
Since it’s the first video I shared to address my online friends, it’s the most painful. Hey, It’s still far better than my baptism; knowing that it would be too difficult for me to speak in front of a crowd, our Pastor did most of the speaking for me.
I was SO nervous and awkward making this video, so you can really hear it in my voice. Nevertheless, the whole point was to be part of a community, share my heart and challenge my comfort-zone. I even had a troll on YouTube leave me a nasty comment about getting a life. I set my videos to private or unlisted after that, but it didn’t stop me from persevering.
People tend to be awkward and nervous due to those who want to tare others down. That’s not my goal, so why should I be so embarrassed for having a soft heart, right?
The only way to bust through a comfort zone, is to do the uncomfortable thing despite the anxiety. Therefore, I consider this one a victory and progress. I don’t need to be confident in myself. Being confident in Jesus is more than enough.
“But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are, so that no human being might boast in the presence of God.”1 Corinthians 1:27-29
Persevering, Poking and Preoccupied.
I made this “hello” two years later. It’s much better, but I was still very self-consciously smirky and giggly. Though I love to engage and address people in a positive way, I never know what to say on camera, but I like that I added the outtakes.
Why is there always something ajar in my videos? In this one it’s the dresser drawer. In my first video it was the closet door. My husband would tell you that I also fail to close cupboard doors. Pippi is preoccupied. Lol…