Sunday I woke very early at around 4:30. When this happens I try listening to music or I may do some reading or writing, but by the time the alarm goes off I’m feeling so sleepy. So Sunday morning I ended up going back to sleep until about 1:30 when I got up, made myself a protein smoothie, cleaned up and went out for my walk.
I was feeling so sad on my walk, I also experienced a bit of anxiety or jitteriness so I figured running up my steps would help get rid of some of this restless energy. It does help.
I’m trying to spend more time outside. Our basement suite feels so dark and suffocating, so I like to sit out on the steps and drink my bottle of water when I come back from my walk. Sunday afternoon I try to catch up with my friend Ronda. So I grabbed both my bottle and tablet, sat down on the steps and messaged “knock knock” She’s always so kind to open the door and let me in.
As we messaged one another I mentioned how sad I was feeling. She asked what triggers this. I told her nothing, it’s just part of my low moods. I thought that getting outside more would help, but so far it hasn’t. As I continued to share she made a comment that made me smile. Then she wrote that she was trying to get me to smile and that God doesn’t want us sad. He wants His children joyful. She added that it’s been really hard for her lately. Therefore, she was saying this for both of our benefit.
As we continued to chat we layed out all of the hard things, but with every difficulty there was a “But God.” Every negative had a positive. So we praised God for these things. Then Ronda said something about how feelings cannot be the source of her joy. It must be based on facts. My response was, Yeah, but it’s hard when you don’t feel that joy. Sometimes we do feel it. That’s why we cry, or laugh… and I don’t mean happiness. Sometimes God literally makes me laugh or cry tears of joy. She responded, I know, and revealed that lately she had been extremely depressed.
I then reminded her of what God reminded me: we will feel that joy again. We are feeling like the Israelites in captivity, but God sets captives free. Ronda said that she was going to pray when she wakes first thing in the morning that He will give us this joy. I told her that I’d pray the same. Just writing this brought me some joy. We had such a great conversation. My sadness was lifting, so I told her that I wasn’t feeling so sad anymore. I was even feeling comforted and hopeful.
“For the Lord comforts Zion; He comforts all her waste places and makes her wilderness like Eden, her desert like the garden of the Lord; joy and gladness will be found in her, thanksgiving and the voice of song.”Isaiah 51:3
(Photo credit goes to Pixabay.com user subak214.)