Estranged

Image by Dariusz Sankowski from Pixabay

Here I sit again 

Not wanting to join in 

Scrolling through posts 

Words from good hosts 

Intentions of comfort, peace and encouragement 

But I’m too weary to read 

Ignoring their good deeds

Convinced their words won’t bring me peace 

Fraught with disbelief 

Could anything life-giving happen to me? 

Awash in my own trials 

Swallowed whole and bankrupt of smiles 

When will I turn to my God

Why won’t I settle my strife? 

Estranged from the Saviour I knew 

Failing to praise through the blues 

Stubborn through and through…

Here I sit again 

Longing to begin again 

Not knowing where to start 

How do I find the way to His heart? 

Scrolling through my troubled mind 

Numb by the passing of time 

Sidetracked by a challenging life 

Muddled by the lows and plight

Waiting for the morning that comes after the night. 

Lord, I can’t reach for your hand

I don’t know why, but I’m sinking on sand

I’m moving forward, but far from your touch 

Missing the glory and grace of your love 

Still too tired to drink in your words 

Too unworthy to ask, not sure I’ll be heard

I know that your love isn’t earned 

But I just can’t make sense of the state of my world. 

Tina 

January 3, 2023


When We feel far from God: Seek Him Continually 

Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I am weak;

O Lord, heal me, for my bones are troubled.

My soul also is greatly troubled;

But You, O Lord—how long? 

Psalm 6:2-3 (New King James Version

How long, O Lord, will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day?”

Psalm 13:1–2 (ESV)

Wait

Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him;

fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way,

over the man who carries out evil devices!

Psalm 37:7 (ESV)

Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage;

wait for the Lord! 

Psalm 27:14 (ESV)

I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the Lord and put their trust in him.

Psalm 40:1-3 (NIV) 

Verses we’re retrieved through John Piper’s What to do When God Feels Distant. 

https://www.desiringgod.org/interviews/what-to-do-when-god-feels-distant

His book sounds interesting too: 

https://www.desiringgod.org/books/when-i-dont-desire-god

22 thoughts on “Estranged

    1. I am struggling, stressed, worn and too often down. I’m trying to find time to get closer to Jesus, but college life is leaving little time with my heavy work load. I can’t spend near enough time with God to truly lift me up. It’s like the waves keep crashing in.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I’m not sure if this beautiful prayer is a spirit-filled psalm, or your own passionate and spirit-filled prayer.
    Either way, He is Emmanuel. He sees you, hears you and not only walks beside you, but dwells in your very own heart! And He is delighted that you pour out your heart like water unto Him and He holds you and longs for you to let go and trust Him; rest.
    xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Lord, you know and love Tina. Meet her where she is at. May she feel your grace and strength pour into her. May she feel your presence with her. Lift her up and set her feet upon solid ground. The heaviness that she feels within, Lord may you break through and remove it for there to be no room other than the Joy of your presence.
    Sending love and prayers Tina 💙

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Tina, I hope you are feeling closer to God. He is with you always.
    I am saying prayers for you for comfort, peace, and hope; may you feel the encompassing love of Jesus. Sending love and hugs! 🙏🦋🐝🌺

    Like

  4. I felt this through and through. It can be a struggle when our hearts and minds aren’t connecting in the way we want. It brings comfort to know that God is there, even when He feels far away. Sending hugs your way. 🤗♥️

    Like

  5. Our feelings are on the same field. Feeling somewhat hopeless lately and although I love the Lord like crazy and hold onto faith, man counseling over the past year has caused me to mourn the trauma of earlier years in my life…ptsd mocks me…the enemy laughs….but God, He will turn this for good. My word for 2023, hope. Praying for us and others who are in the same battle.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Sometimes our daily lives seek a quiet place, away from the helter-skelter pace. Patience helps us to allow our hearts and minds to let Jesus into our presence. Praying that you know that He is always walking with you.

    Like

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